Yes well, I have been trying to see the good. But sometimes I just forget, often for several days. This morning, I was awake at 4am and trying to find the good in that.
It was hard, as frankly, I was pissed off.
It seems wrong, to start the day feeling cross about being awake when you don’t want to be. I lay there thinking about seeing the good and really was challenged to find any. Then it came to me. I realised that if I got up and went into the living room I wouldn’t get bitten by mosquitoes. It is the cool season and the house is wonderfully free of mosses at the moment. I think that is a good attempt at seeing the good at 4am. Shallow but not bad.
As I’ve mentioned before; difficulty falling asleep, waking up frequently during the night, difficulty returning to sleep and waking up too early in the morning; these are all part of the FUN of the peri-menopausal DECADE before you reach fully fledged menopausal – dom. I googled, “why does menopause give you insomnia” and the long, JOLLY list of articles and books is wonderful.
Full of titles such as; The Change Before the Change: Everything You Need to Know to Stay Healthy in the Decade Before Menopause by Laura E. Corio, Linda G. Kahn · BANTAM DELL · Paperback · 448 pages · ISBN 0553380311
Could It Be Perimenopause?: How Women 35-50 Can Overcome Forgetfulness, Mood Swings, Insomnia, Weight Gain, Sexual Dysfunction, and Other Telltale Signs of Hormonal Imbalance.by Steven R. Goldstein, Laurie Ashner · Vermilion · Paperback · 242 pages · ISBN 0091816696
I have read neither, I am sure they are brilliant. BUT don’t the titles make you want to run from them screaming? I still can’t get over the fact that I DIDN’T KNOW peri-menopause was coming to get me – and thousands of others.
How come I didn’t know?
I feel sure that a hint, an idea, a warning, a clue should have been given to me by someone, a doctor perhaps? I should have seen something, a glossy pamphlet or brochure?
You don’t need to read anything, except THIS blog; because I will tell you, why you can’t sleep for 10 years. Your flipping ovaries decrease the production of progesterone – which is a sleep-promoting hormone.
I know in time that, I have to come to terms with my lot; but not yet; no bloody way. I am still outraged. How come I knew so little about these wonderful hormones? I never appreciated them when I had enough of them, as I thought they were mine to keep. Enough to snore sweetly through the whole night.
THE WHOLE NIGHT. EVERY NIGHT.